He Suffers With His Nerves

Project Description:
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The male psyche is a problematic entity, and when drawn out into the harsh light of analysis and discussion reels, yearning to retreat back into the darkness. In Modern Ireland, the notion of a man seeking support for mental health issues, despite numerous awareness campaigns and the like, is still heavily weighted with stigma and shame. This project is a document of the emotional turmoil a young man faces in his everyday life. In photographing his body and the surrounding spaces in which he feels the most at war with himself, the feelings of isolation, insecurity, and melancholy are encompassed. Through this process, the project becomes transfigured as his mental anguish itself has been used as a catalyst for the recovery of his mind. Thus, the project functions as a method of therapy.
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Heres a little information regarding the background of the project. The project is a document of two years of my intense struggle with depression and mental health. The key factor being the relationship I had been in with a person, who I fell deep in love with for the first time. They broke my heart and my mental health deteriorated. In Ireland, there is very little mental health awareness in relation to men and even less directed at helping LGBTQ people with mental health issues. That being said there are couple of amazing groups here, but they mainly focus on LGBTQ youth, not young adults. The project was about documenting myself in everyday life, through photographing the spaces in which I felt isolated and the most alone. I also used self-portraiture in these spaces as a method of photo-therapy, which is when creativity is used as an outlet to vent, and to make something beautiful out of the intense feelings I was experiencing. I used this method of healing because I felt I had no access to a support system which would understand my situation/lifestyle at the time, it was also lethargy on my part because I felt at some points I just couldn't leave the house. The title 'he suffers with his nerves' is a sort of umbrella term for someone who isn't right in the head or has mental health issues. It is used as a way of brushing off the subject of the person who comes into question. As Ireland is a catholic country there are still some people who are very conservative, like my mother, who would use that term if I came up in conversation between her and a friend, being someone with mental health here is seen as kind of embarrassing especially a man, who is meant to be strong in body and mind.